My life is organized CHAOS!

Today I was listening to my music playlist here that I have on the blog and realized that there was a song with some not very nice language in it. So I of course took my playlist off here and am currently taking that song off the list. If you happen to hear another one, please let me know so I can take it off. I don't approve of bad language in my music or in my home.

So I was looking to see what other songs I could add to it since I can have a total of 100, and I think I have about 73.

I am adding the songs that I consider my songs for my boys. I am a singer and so music is very important in my life. I don't think I could go a day without singing or hearing some kind of music. I have loved music since I was a small child. So when I was pregnant with each of my boys, I picked out a song that reminded me of them, and they will always in my mind and heart be their songs.

So Chandler's song since he was my firstborn is Shania Twain's -From This Moment (aka Channy Man). I heard this song on my way home from a doctor's appointment, and I immediately knew that this was my baby's song. It's about a couple being together, the words about knowing from this moment that I will always love you. I really like the words, and they speak my feelings about how much I love all my children, not just Chandler. So that is the first song on my playlist right now.

Next is by Diamond Rio -One more Day for Owen (aka Owenator). When Owen was born he had a small hole in his heart. The doctor's called it a VSD, Ventricular Septal Defect. The doctor said it would probably close all by itself. But, when he told me about it, I had a difficult time with it. I had just had my second son, and wasn't ready to give him back to the Lord yet. So I picked this song, because it talks about having one more day with someone, and in my case it is my precious Owen. I love him so much, just like Chandler and Hayden. Every time I hear that song I get teary, but I still have him with me 7 yeas later, and he is an amazing little boy. I am glad he chose my family to be a part of.

Now last but not least is by Billy Dean -Let Them Be Little, for Hayden (aka HD). My other two boys were 6 and almost 3, so I didn't have anyone little. Plus the words in this song are what I want to do, let them be little for as long as possible. They are growing up so fast.

Chandler will be 10 in a few months, no more single digits. :( Owen is less than a year from being baptized. I am excited for that day next year. Then Hayden is less than a year from being in Pre-K. That will be a day I will cry I am sure of it. My baby will be old enough to go to school. Even if I am gifted enough to have more children, I think Hayden will always be my baby, well for now I guess. I'll have to see what the future holds. He will be excited to finally get to ride the school bus. He has been quite upset that he doesn't get to go now.

My life is about to get a lot more busy, if that is even possible. I seem to be running all the time. Between my church callings, my boys activities, their school, my choir, my Enrichment meetings, their scouts, my yard, my daycare, etc...Owen starts soccer today. We get to meet his coach and get his uniform. And his games will be on Tuesdays and Thursdays, Tuesdays are the boys dinner with their dad, and usually every other is my nail appointment (one of my two splurges for myself, my nails and the highlights in my hair); Tuesdays are my church meetings, and Wednesdays are scouts, Thursdays have been ward volleyball night, and Mondays are Family Home Evening, Sundays are church, and every other weekend the boys go with their dad, so I do my grocery shopping and run the errands I don't get to do during the week. Then in November Chandler will start Basketball again, and in the Spring Hayden will probably play baseball or tee-ball I mean. OH MY GOODNESS!!!! I am never going to stop! But maybe that is another help that keeps me thin. ;)

Ok, I am going to talk about a few more songs that have special meaning to me on here and are at the top of my play list. I can't talk about them all, but most of them on the list have some kind of significance to my life right now, or my new life that I am embarking on as a single person again.

I have had some difficult times in the past 6 months as most of you know. And I have been getting used to the idea of being alone, well, only in the sense that I don't have a companion. I am NEVER alone. I always have the Lord and my Heavenly Father to lean on. And They have truly blessed me so much in these past 6 months. I know that my whole life has had many blessings, but these recent months I truly know that I am being watched over. Also, I have some really great friends that have stuck by me, and helped me get through this divorce.

Anyway, the next song is by Tim McGraw -My Next Thirty Years. I like this song because I feel like I am getting a second chance to be different or better, which is hard for me because I thought I was doing a great job already. But I am hoping that I can be the right one for someone. Anyway, I am already doing things differently, I eat less, I drink a lot of water, milk and a little juice, I don't drink soda, I exercise more, I play more with my children, I am more relaxed, I am reading my scriptures daily with my children, and I am living life more now. I gave up a lot of things when I got married 11 years ago, and I won't do that again. I am going to go back to school and get a degree, and I am going to still pursue my singing, whether it be in a choir, as a soloist, or in some kind of opera setting. I love singing, and I can't give it up. It is one of my many passions and talents, and I am going to use it for all it's worth. I am not going to let this life just pass me by. My Faith has been strengthened, and I will forever be thankful to Jesus Christ for comforting me in my times of need.

The last one I'll talk about is by Aerosmith called I Don't Want to Miss a Thing. This is for my boys. I feel like if I close my eyes I am going to miss something that they do. I am thankful that I have been able to stay home for most of their lives, at time I've only had to work a little or when they were sleeping. And now I still stay home with my home daycare and take care of them when they need me, and still provide for them financially, without having to work outside my home.

I love my boys with all my heart, and I am grateful to be their mother here on this earth. I don't know where my life would be without them, and also without this wonderful Gospel of Jesus Christ that I am a member of. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is the one and only true gospel here on this earth today, and I know that for a fact. I have studied my scriptures and prayed about it. I will never walk away from it, it is my life. If you want to know more about it contact me by comment or email, and I will help you get in touch with some misionaries that can further explain about our church. They are all over the world serving for Jesus Christ.

Thanks to everyone who has helped me through my trials these past few months. I can't thank you all enough, you have been my shoulders to cry on, my venting boards, my friends, etc. I just felt like today I needed to write a personal post with no pictures. And I wanted to talk about my boys a bit, and the songs that are special to me about them. Thanks for taking the time to read this, and I hope you will leave me something to remember you by in the comment section.

I love you all,
Amy ;)

More to come...